I am not going to deny that there is definite chance, okay a CERTAINTY that mine has been a fucker. I’m not talking about him though, cause here is the deal. I DEAL with him all of the time. When he treats other kids like crap, he is compelled to tell me the truth about it. (he tells me the truth to a fault) When he’s mean to someone, we have brutal discussions about how he made the other kid feel. I then proceed to shame him into submission. (good parent) There are a couple of parents out there who have received apology phone calls and surprise front door apologies for his behavior.
I remember how this all feels. I also know I can’t control other people. I know I can’t control other middle schooler kids for sure. But what do I do? How do I deal with the assholes at school taunting him, teasing him, making him challenge his worth. He is vulnerable, sad, and very low. I know, I know, we all got through it. But, I don’t remember how I did it. Even when I give him advice I sound like Andy Griffith without the eloquence or accent.
Pretty sure you are in the same boat. I just wanted to be honest here. Cause truthfully, I am just so very sad that there are bullies, fuck faces that hurt my child. Can’t wait for the girl to start middle school next year.
Wow! This is so powerful and moving. Good for you for having these tough discussions and making what must be tough phone calls. I applaud you for so many things, my friend!
I had to negotiate a mean girl in Kindergarten! If Jonah is telling you the truth in middle school, you have won the battle. My most recent mantra..along with “I love you,” and “Do what your teacher says,” (this one creeps me out, even as I say it) and “Have a good day,” I have added “Treat others with respect and only hang out with those who respect you.” I envision a chant as long as the Letter from Birmingham Jail by the time she hits middle school. This post is smarmy, but good reminding at us to support the good weirdness of our kids. You’ve probably read it, an old post, but sweet: http://www.handsfreemama.com/2014/04/29/children-who-shine-from-within/
Thanks cyn. ❤
I have engaged the counselor before and they have been great. They take this very seriously in schools and the counselors will bring the kids together and they will also be on the lookout in the lunch room. Get the school involved…as I’m sure you have done already.
I did! Thanks. It has helped.